Let’s talk a moment about your New Year’s Resolution. Do you have one or two? Have you given up the idea of declaring a resolution because buy March or April you’ve given up or even forgotten what it was in the first place. Trust me I feel ya! Setting that resolution and then keeping it so we can make lasting change in our life can be challenging. Let’s see if we can make it a little easier. First let’s change it from a ‘resolution’ to an ‘intention’. Setting an intention encourages us to look a little deeper into the reason for change. So how do you set an intention?
By asking yourself why…. a lot.
Grab a pencil and some paper and write down your intention.
Let’s say your intention is to quit smoking or lose weight (the two most common ‘resolutions’) or maybe it’s to spend more time with your family or save more money, whatever your intention is now ask yourself ‘Why’. (write it down)…. Now ask yourself ‘Why do I want to ____________(fill in the blank).
Let’s use giving up smoking as an example. Your answer to Why might be ‘ I know it’s bad for me’. Ok good start, now dig a little deeper, ‘Why is it bad for you?’ Your answer might be… It’s bad for my health, it costs too much money and it makes my hair smell like an ashtray (Had a BF many years ago who told me kissing someone who smoked was like kissing an ashtray, I like kissing… A Lot. So I quit smoking, but I digress)….Now dig deeper…..Ask yourself ‘In what way is it bad for my health?’ …. You get the picture, you keep asking why, and you keep writing them down, usually the answers are the negatives about the behavior you want to change. But now turn the questions around a bit, dig deeper but in a different direction. Ask yourself about the positives, the good things that can come from making a change…How will quitting benefit my life? And write down all the good that can come from making the change.. ‘I will breath better, I will smell better, I’ll save money I’ll have more energy. I will be healthier.’ You can do this with any change you want to make. Remind yourself about the rewards for stepping out on faith.
Another thing you can do is to frame your intention in the here and now. “In this moment I am healthy”. “I am living a smoke free life”. And remind yourself often of your intention. In yoga we call this a Sankalpa, I have written about Sankalpas before. Having a Sankalpa can be a powerful concept.
Here are some other things to keep in mind that will help making change easier .
* Hang out with the right people. Do your best to avoid the places and people that may tempt you, keep good company; in yoga it’s called Satsanga. Spend time with others that are making the same changes as you. There is a reason that groups like AA have such a great success., they are like-minded people coming together to support each other.
* Cultivate what’s good for you. Instead of putting all the focus on what negative thing in your life you’re trying to change, remember the good things you’re doing and cultivate those habits and attitudes.
*Begin a gratitude practice and if you already have one take it one step further and write down the things you are grateful for. Daily! Everyday write down 5 things you are thankful for.
*Meditate. Sit quietly, let the mind be still, give yourself those quiet moments to de-stress, to calm and quiet the mind, the body and the spirit. When we are stressed, when the body, mind and spirit are filled with anxiety then those old habits are often the things we turn to. Like comfort food they calm us but only for a moment and in the long run they cause more turbulence. Taking time every day for meditation gives us clarity and peace.
* Be joyful! Know that you are making your life better not only for you for those around you.
Change is hard. But when you learn the different techniques you can use then change is not only easier but joyful as well.
BTW My intention is to blog more. How am I doing so far :)